Do You Know?
by Lazy Tobi
Summary: He had stopped caring long ago, but he'd never stopped loving.  Severus always thought something would crack, break... shatter into a million pieces.  He never thought it'd be his heart.  Severus Snape x Lily Evans drabble


**Disclaimer**: Accio copyrights!

**- Do You Know? -**

Severus had always grown up, after first meeting Lily Evans, thinking she'd never abandon him; it happened too many times for him to count, to care anymore. Maybe it was the Sorting Hat's fault, since once there was a rivalry as old as the founding father's between them, he knew something would eventually crack, break, and shatter into a million pieces. Severus never knew it'd be his heart.

"Anything." The word haunted him, sliding past his lips like the ghost of her tangling her hands in his long, unkempt hair.

"What to do with you, Sev-Sev!" Lily had laughed with him, not at him, ruffling his short, untidy hair. They were young, maybe not even into the double digits yet; he was glad he'd grown out his hair, for when they entered Hogwarts, a boy with the same haircut had stolen her away from him. Somewhere in those seven hateful years, James Potter broke his nose and made it crooked – intentional or not, it didn't matter. Nothing ever did when the golden boy James Potter was involved, especially with "Snivellus" was the butt of his attentions, jokes, and pranks.

Maybe he should've gone to their wedding, just to screw with James; he knew the invitation wasn't from the groom. Maybe he should've congratulated Lily when she wrote to him, telling him she was pregnant with Potter's child. Maybe he should've tried to break James's nose, to see if it'd come out crooked and tell the witch fixing it that his nose had always been crooked since it fit his disposition. Maybe he shouldn't have become a Death Eater in a fit of depressed rage. Maybe he should've taken an interest when a man named Peter Something became a Death Eater since he knew Potter's little group of Marauders consisted of James Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and a one _Peter_ Pettigrew.

Maybe, maybe, maybe.

It was all in the past now, anyways.

Dead and gone, literally.

Except Harry… Harry Potter, the boy who lived. The boy who looked - except for his eyes -, acted, and talked exactly like his father. It was loathsome to think _his_ Lily Evans gave birth to such a thing. Severus couldn't help but fall into the guilt trip Dumbledore gave for him when Harry came to Hogwarts; it was because of those green eyes, reminiscent of Lily's. Harry was the only thing of Lily Evans left on the world, and Severus would be damned before the poxy prat died. Lily Evans would have to live on in the Potter line instead of the Snape one.

He'd stop caring for his appearance after Lily started James, in a futile hope she'd come up to him, ruffle his hair for a second before grimacing at the grease, saying, "What to do with you, Sev-Sev!"

She never did.

Although Severus stopped caring what he looked like, he always kept his hair at a length that wouldn't get in his way, cutting it off messily by himself, wishing Lily was around like when they were wee little kids since she was better than him, even with muggle scissors and not magic. Stubble adorned and scratched its way eventually onto his face after he got old enough, but Severus let it be most of the time; after he saw what Sirius Black looked like in the wedding pictures, he changed his mind. Stubble never again danced across his pale face to remind him of the man condemned for a crime he didn't commit; Severus never spoke up for him, never _ever_. After all, Sirius hadn't ever stood up for him, either; it was like a kind of payback for both him and James since Severus promised not to cause much bodily or mental harm to Harry, just for Lily's sake.

"Always…"

A doe welcomed Severus, along its side Lily, with out stretched arms, instead of King's Cross after Harry, Ron, and Hermione left him in the Shrieking Shack.

"What to do with you, Sev-Sev!"

**A/N**: _A little depressing thing. :) Lily/Severus became my second favorite HP pairing after I read HP7 (right after Remus/Tonks)… I know, some of y'all won't like that, but, yeah. I took a bit of creative liberty since I haven't read DH when it first came out in the summer of '08 – I really hate it that JKR killed everyone cool but brought Harry back. Anyone else think Wuthering Heights would be an excellent story for Snape and Lily?_

_~ Tobi_


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